Guyz, pretty sick of hearing about Adrian Peterson having a hard time not knowing if he's still in trouble or not, or what his punishment is going to be. The NFL is being kind of slow about this. To me, the punishment for him is straightforward: make him pull his pants down, bend over, and take swats from a wire hanger in the ass, legs, and nutsack. And if he doesn't feel sorry enough, do it again. Eye for an eye, ya know? He's a grown man, he'll understand.
Anyway, now that we've solved that issue, I think we need to talk about the Sacramento Queens of NBA basketball. When I did my semi-thorough, highly accurate but not very well thought out pre-season ranking of the 2014 NBA season, the Kings were in my bottom echelon of “Teams that literally have no good players”. Then, the Kings got off to a 5-1 start, beating some decent teams including the Blake “Bitch Slap” Griffin and the LA Clippers. They were making some serious noise, and I was starting to look foolish. Good thing my man Kendrick Perkins was there to remind everyone of who the Kings are. Honestly, tho Perk, you're one to talk. Perk is slow as molasses. I can literally say the word “molasses” during his jumpshot, which is without a doubt the worst jumpshot in the NBA today. He is maybe one of 10 players in the NBA who would not get any minutes if he played for the Kings.
Anyway, I was curious, so I watched 3 quarters of the Kings playing the Mavericks on November 11th, where the Kings went up by 20 in the first quarter, took a 10 point lead into the half, then swiftly gave up that lead with 10 minutes left in the 3rd, and lost the game by more than 10. The very next game they did the exact same thing to the Memphis Grizzlies, except they lead the game with 0.3 seconds left. That's when they uncorked quite simply the worst defended inbounds play I've ever seen. I don't need to see anything more, I was right, the Kings still do not employ any good NBA players.
To be fair, it takes some good team chemistry to run up a 20 point lead on the road in the NBA. Every team has at least 1 guy who can break up the momentum of 10-0 run. It takes a concerted effort to go up 20-4. That being said, it’s not like the Mavs or the Grizzlies rode a monster performance from Dirk or Z-Bo in those games. The Kings just sucked after the first 12 minutes. They did the exact thing last night against the Pelicans: 12 point lead first quarter, lost the game by the time the 4th quarter started.
So, if you're a Kings fan, how should you feel about the Rudy Gay extension (3 years, $40M).
Against the Mavericks Nov 11th, the Kings went on a stretch in the 3rd quarter where they literally did not get the ball within 20 feet of the hoop for like 5 or 6 possessions.
7 turnovers by Rudy Gay in that game.
Against the Grizzlies 2 days later, I guess you can say they fought pretty hard against a pretty good team, but they literally made the only mistake you can make to allow another team to score on an inbounds play with 0.3 seconds left. Who made the mistake on the defensive switch?
Rudy Gay.
Basically the very next thing that happened is the Kings extended his contract. Ladies and gentlemen, your 2014 Sacramento Kings. Well, at least they have Boogie, right? Oh wait, Boogie doesn't even play 30 minutes per game because he keeps fouling out. The Sacramento Queens still do not employ any good NBA players.
